Monday, April 14, 2003
So. Yes. Today. Today will be the last day of the beginning of this blog. That's it. It's over. After this, the blog will begin. And that's that. That's it. Yes. Hmm. Yes. Hmmm. Because, yes because, yes, the reason for this is that today will merely be an experiment in the aberrant. Tomorrow, the delicious and the pedestrian. Today, the aberrant. Things will get better tomorrow. I swear it. This will all get better. This will all go away.
Today now, though, the aberrant. Now, you might imagine that I, with all of this hemming and hawing and hmming and yessing, that I, with all of that, have just been wasting your time. But you would be wrong. And you would be right. Yes. Because, today, today, today, we are exploring the aberrant. We are exploring the aberrant and we are plumbing the depths of tedium. Because tedium, yes, you're quite correct, tedium, is the key to the blog world, and the key, indeed, yes, yes even, to the entire Web.
You will agree with me, no doubt, that a certain portion of tedium is expected in any blog. There is simply no getting around it. There is no helping it. Whether describing one's pet or dissecting the page three story of the daily Times, the blog is--because of the now solipsistic nature of the blogger--tedious. It is tedious. Do not be offended. I am not offended. I am enlightened. I am trancendent. I am translucent (don't ask). We have limited appetites for the minutiae of other's lives. I am not wrong, now, am I? Am I? No, no, no, no. Whatever the medium, we have limited appetites for personal minutiae. That is so. Undoubtedly.
But no. But we put up with the tedium of the blog. We, on some level, expect the tedium. We sometimes complain about the tedium, but on occasion, we embrace the tedium. The tedium, though--there is no getting around it--is present in all blogs. And it is our goal here, not to avoid the tedium. Not to--no, no, no, no--avoid that tedium, but to transform that tedium. To add to that tedium. As the reader must embrace some measure of tedium, the writer too must embrace tedium. So we are here inflating, enhancing, conflating, stretching, straining and extrapolating on the tedium. We are hemming, we are hawing. We are, ad absurdum, exploring the tedium that a blog can bring about. We explore the aberrant, we chart the unmapped territory of tedium.
Yes. Yes. Yes. This little dinghy is taking a far different tack from those high-profile blogs that navigate their tedium with a steady hand. We are awash in it. Awash. Awash. Awash. We are awash. But listen: we attempt to, in embracing the tedium, we attempt to excoriate that tedium from the blog. Yes, that is right. That is right! We attempt to scrub it out.
Tedium, ad absurdum, becomes something not tedium, but quite the opposite--a-tedium, if you will. Yes. Yes, that's it. Yes. A-tedium.
But wait: one, not I, but one, one far more keen of mind, one with far more mental acuity would say, would, in fact, say, in response to the goal of excoriating tedium by stretching it to its limits, one would say that we are obnubilating our signifiers.
And, to some extent, I would agree.
I would agree. That's right. Yes. If, once absurd enough to be entertaining, tedium ceases to be tedium, and if we continue to call it tedium, even when it is entertaining, then we have obnubilated our signifier. And, to some extent, that is the very goal. Yes, that is our goal. Hmm.
Tomorrow though, nothing of the sort. Deliciousness tomorrow. Pedestrianism and deliciousness. Yes.
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